“Because once you’re afraid of one thing, you can get scared of a lot of stuff.”

The air is so humid it feels damp. The sky is gray. The slight breeze does nothing to clear the air. We are starting days of hot weather. I will be a hermit sitting in the cool house with doors and windows closed. The Sox game last night was rained out. There was thunder and lightning. It missed us.

My laundry is done, but the pile sits in the living room waiting to be brought upstairs. That’s progress to me and a check off the to-do list.

Ghost Shark is today’s unbelievable movie. The shark can appear in water, any water, including bathtubs and water coolers. It doesn’t eat the bodies. It is after all a ghost but it does lop off heads or cut the bodies in half. Even to me this is one strange movie.

Clowns don’t scare me, haven’t ever scared me, though the clown in Stephen King’s It is scary. I grew up with Clarabell. He honked instead off talked except he did say good-bye on the very last Howdy Doody show. Maybe it’s clown make-up which scares people or their bad taste in colorful clothes with ruffles. I guess clown shoes don’t help much either.

I admit the man with the hook scared me when I was a kid. My father told us the story with heightened drama, hand gestures and the occasional grabs of our knees which made us jump. When he and my mother once went grocery shopping, we were alone which was fine until we heard scratching on the screen and no other sounds. It scared us enough we hid under the bed probably the first spot a crazed killer would look, but we didn’t have the time to discuss the best hiding place in the house. We just ran. It was, of course, my father. He thought it was funny. We didn’t at least until we caught our breaths and our hearts stopped beating wildly in our chests.

I do like to be scared but not about real things. I never expect boogeymen in the bushes or that my house will be targeted by roving marauders. I keep my inside doors open. I have no window shades. The curtains stay open to the sun though not all windows even have curtains. If I hear a noise, I usually investigate, a little timidly but I go anyway. The other night the dog’s backyard lights were triggered. She was inside. I went out on the deck to check the yard but neither saw nor heard anything. I just shrugged at the mystery and went back inside the house. I left the inside door open.

The first place I ever lived alone was in Ghana. It took a bit of adjustment, but after a while I enjoyed being by myself. My house was right by the back gate which I sometimes had to climb over to get back into the school compound after hours. The watchman pretended not to hear me so he could stay by his bedding and his fire. My inside door was always open even then. My house was broken into one night. I was sleeping outside and slept through it all. Nothing much was stolen as I didn’t have much. My camera was found outside the house. You couldn’t buy film for it in Ghana so it was useless to the thief. I had very little money which was gone, but Peace Corps reimbursed us. I had my pocket picked at the train station and was the victim of an attempted purse snatching. Despite all of those, I was never afraid.

I have lived alone my entire time in this house. I haven’t ever heard scratching on the screen or eerie sounds at night. Gracie used to bark at sounds but doesn’t anymore unless there is a knock at the door or the bell is rung. So much for my watch dog.  Regardless, I feel perfectly safe.

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8 Comments on ““Because once you’re afraid of one thing, you can get scared of a lot of stuff.””

  1. Hedley Says:

    The Detroit air is unstable – I was marching through my normal lunchtime walk routine and got blasted in a torrential downpour. I returned to the office like a large poodle that had just got out of the lake, much to the amusement of my co workers. Fortunately I had a change of clothes and have been restored to acceptable status.

    • katry Says:

      My Dear Hedley,
      I had a chuckle with your choice of a poodle. I might have suggested a dog with far more fur. How lucky you keep a change of clothes.

      Boston had a huge torrential downpour last night which flooded roads. We didn’t and we could use that rain.

  2. olof1 Says:

    Chilly and rainy here now and we can expect thunder during the night or late evening. It is pouyring down now and it will continue like this for at least three days they say. I’m not sure I like that but we do need it so I won’t complain, at least not today 🙂

    I’m usually not scared when something happens but I can be afterwards when I realise how close it was that something could have gone wrong. I’m much like my mother in that way. Once she was threatened by a man with an ax and he made clear what he was going to do with it on her. Instead of getting scared she attacked him 🙂 🙂 She was however shivering a long time after it had happened 🙂

    I’ve been scared once, really much, while reading the book Cujo but that’s a long story. I wonder if I’ve ever written about it in my blog, if not I have something I can write about a day when I can’t think of anything else 🙂

    Have a great day!

    Christer.

    • katry Says:

      Christer,
      I wanted rain yesterday, but north of us got it, and they got a lot of rain. It flooded roads. It thundered which I always like. The weather doesn’t show rain for four or five days and even then it is iffy.

      Wow, I’m applauding your mother. I figure adrenaline got her to attack him, and when it was over, she didn’t need it anymore.

      I don’t remember being scared as an adult. Maybe apprehensive, but not scared.

      I had a nightmare after reading an H.B. Lovecraft book. I woke up panting from fear there I realized it was only a dream!

      Stay dry!

  3. Bob Says:

    Today we had unusually moderate temperature for August. Only a high of 91 degrees. Although it was a little humid this morning I drove to work with my sunroof open because it was a cool 72 degrees at seven AM. When the morning low temperature is over 80 degrees it’s just uncomfortable and going to be a hot day.

    Like you I also grew up with Clarabell from Howdy Doody and clowns never scared me either. My one fear came from the 1954 movie ‘War of the Worlds’ which still frightens me. I can’t watch any of the modern day remakes because the thought of them dredges up bad memories of being seven years old again and having nightmares of a Martian invasion. I don’t enjoy being scared in the movies, on TV or in amusement parks. I like being in control.

    • katry Says:

      Bob,
      72˚ is a great temperature and is what we had during the day most of July. This week is hot and humid. I was sorry the rain missed us yesterday. The best day coming is Sunday with low humidity and a temperature around 75˚.

      I didn’t see War of the Worlds as young as you did so I wasn’t ever afraid of it. The one movie that scared me was a scene form The House of Wax. I was probably around 10 and was watching the TV in my bedroom. The female lead started hitting Vincent Price on his face when she realized her friend was murdered and had been turned into a wax figure. Vincent’s face fell off. He had been burned in a fire and made a wax face to cover what his face looked like. I ran into buy parents’ room. They figured out I was scared. My dad told me it was only a movie and not to be scared. I took his advice.

  4. Denise Says:

    Eastern NC was pleasantly warm, today the humidity will be back. I’m not afraid of clowns but never liked the dancing bear on Captain Kangaroo. And hated that Judy Collins song! I also search for answers to the bumps in the night or anytime. Some people call that nosy, I say aware. Hope the animals are well. Denise

    • katry Says:

      Denise,
      I hate the humidity. It defines a Massachusetts August. The air always damp.

      I am a huge Judy fan and have seen her in concert three or four times. Send in the Clowns is a commercial hit as opposed to a folk one. I get why you don’t like it.

      Gracie’s back legs are weak from whatever is going on in her brain. The vet said it could be lesions or cancer. I’m doing all I can to make her life easier. Maddie, the cat, is just fine. Thanks for asking!!


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